1        I asked God for a bike, but I know God doesn't work that way. So I stole a bike and asked for forgiveness.

2        Do not argue with an idiot. He will drag you down to his level and beat you with experience.

3        I want to die peacefully in my sleep, like my grandfather. . Not screaming and yelling like the passengers in his car.

4        The last thing I want to do is hurt you. But it's still on the list.

5        Sex is not the answer. Sex is the question. "Yes" is the answer.                  

6        Women might be able to fake orgasms. But men can fake a whole relationship.                  

7        We live in a society where pizza gets to your house before the police.                  

8        Having sex is like playing bridge. If you don't have a good partner, you'd better have a good hand.                  

9        We never really grow up, we only learn how to act in public.                  
10      Light travels faster than sound. This is why some people appear bright until you hear them speak.            

11      War does not determine who is right - only who is left.                  

12      If I agreed with you we'd both be wrong.               

13      Men have two emotions: Hungry and Horny. If you see him without an erection, make him a sandwich.                 

14      The early bird might get the worm, but the second mouse gets the cheese.                 

15      Politicians and diapers have one thing in common. They should both be changed regularly, and for the same reason.                  

16      Children: You spend the first 2 years of their life teaching them to walk and talk. Then you spend the next 16 years telling them to sit down and shut-up.                

17      Knowledge is knowing a tomato is a fruit; Wisdom is not putting it in a fruit salad.               

18      Evening news is where they begin with 'Good evening,' and then proceed to tell you why it isn't.            

19      If sex is a pain in the ass, then you're doing it wrong.               

20      My mother never saw the irony in calling me a son-of-a-bitch.

Got this email from a friend.  A guide to a successful life...

A - Avoid negative sources, people, places, things and habits.

B - Believe in yourself

C - Consider things from every angle

D - Don't give up and don't give in

E - Enjoy life today - Yesterday is gone! Tomorrow may never come.

F - Family and Friends are hidden treasures, seek then and enjoy their riches.

G - Give more than you planned to.

H - Hang on to your dreams

I - Ignore those who try to discourage you

J - Just Do It

K - Keep trying no matter how hard it seems, it will get easier

L - Love yourself first and most

M - Make it Happen

N - Never lie, cheat or steal; always strike a fair deal

O - Open your eyes and see things as they really are.

P - practice make perfect

Q - Quitter never win, and winners never quit

R - Read, study and learn about everything important in your life.

S - Stop procrastinating

T - Take control of your own destiny

U - Understand yourself to better understand others

V - Visualize it

W - Want it more than anything

X - Xcellerate your efforts

Y - You are unique of all God's creations, nothing can replace you.

Z - Zero in on your target and Go for it

As a mother of one adorable 7-year old daughter, I felt for this story. I just wish I will not be placed in a position where I have to do the same thing...

By Daily Mail Reporter
15th July 2009

A dying mother gave her husband a 'masterclass in motherhood' to help him bring up their two young children alone.

When Jemma Oliver, aged just 29, found out she was dying of cancer she knew her heartbroken husband Jason would struggle with the daily domestic chores as well as bringing up two young children.

So in her last days she trained Jason to master all the tasks she had done for Keaton, four, and Codi, two.

Legacy of love: Jemma Oliver left husband Jason with a 'mother's masterclass' to ensure he could cope bringing up their children, Keaton, 4, and Codi, 2, when she was diagnosed with terminal cancer. And she left a list of instructions to make sure her two little children would be brought up just as she wanted after she had gone. Jemma even brought in a qualified hairdresser to teach Jason how to do a French plait in little Codi's hair.

She then bought cards to be given to the children on their birthdays in the years ahead withouth their mum.

Jason, 32, said: 'Jemma thought of everything and then organised me so that I would be able to cope. 'She spent every minute of her last days planning how she wanted the children to grow up. 'She decided which schools she wanted the children to go to - and left instructions on buying the right clothes for Codi. 'Jemma made me promise I would take her sisters shopping with me because they would know what she'd like for Codi.'

'When she was really poorly I took time off work to look after the children. They were easy compared to the housework.

'I didn't know how to turn on the dishwasher and I wasn't sure which washing went into which load.

'The house was total chaos until she took me in hand. Then slowly and patiently, Jemma told me what to do. She taught me how to do everything for the children - and for my sake too.'

Codi was only four months old when Jemma was diagnosed with advanced cervical cancer. She underwent a hysterectomy, chemotherapy and radiotherapy and went into remission for a while - hoping she had beaten the cancer.

  Going it alone: Jemma ensured Jason was given tips on how to plait his daughter's hair and advised on which schools the young children should attend

But Jemma later discovered a lump in her neck and doctors told her the cancer had returned and this time it was terminal.

Crane driver Jason said: 'One day she took my hand into hers and said softly: "I know I'm dying. I've got a lot of planning to do". 'I went through a masterclass in being a mum for the children. She thought of everything to help me. 'She wrote on loads of cards for the birthdays she would miss - then wrote dozens of letters for Keaton and Jemma to read when they're older. 'They all say the same thing - about how much she loved them.

'She decided which schools she wanted them to go to and even organised a hairdresser to teach me how to plait Codi's hair. She told me: 'I can't have my girl looking scruffy. No bumps in her hair please!' 'I'm a typical bloke and just didn't know how to do a lot of the things that Jemma would do as a mum. 'I'm used to doing things round the house like putting up shelves but pink hair bobbles and French plaits were a whole new ball game. 'After my first few clumsy attempts I eventually passed the test and Jemma gave me a smile.

Final words: As well as this note, Jemma left a series of birthday cards and letters to her children to ensure they never forget her .Jemma also planned her own funeral - asking for a pink coffin and for all the mourners to wear her favourite colour. And she asked for their wedding day song 'Everything I Do' by Bryan Adams to be played at the funeral service. Before she died Jemma bought Jason his favourite aftershave and a thank you card.

It said: 'Just a quick note to say how much I love you. A huge thank you for everything you've done. I must be getting on your nerves now! All my love today and always wherever I am, Jemma.'

Jemma died at the family home in Chepstow, Gwent, with Jason holding her hand and her two little children sitting on the bed. Heartbroken Jason said today: 'We are doing our best to carry on without her but it's hard. 'I constantly look at her plans and instructions to help me. I feel as though she's there watching over us, guiding us along the way.'

Received this from a former colleague. Don't know if this is true or not. All I know is that this e-mail made me laugh. Serves the man right... for being unfaithful and for lying to his wife.

Attack on World Trade Center was

one of the biggest attack by terrorists

People who survived from this attack

considered themselves to be one of the

luckiest people there.

One person was not lucky enough.

Infact, this was the first divorce case

because of WTC attacks.

 

Published on Today 4/21/2009

1 The Woman Who Swallowed the Engagement Ring Hidden in a Milkshake

When Reed Harris asked Kaitlin Whipple to marry him, he didn't plan it out that well. First he took to her a Wendy's to do it. Second he hid the ring her Frosty milkshake. Third he invited her friends and one of them challenged to a race to down the Frosty. What happens next makes you wonder why she said yes. She swallowed the ring whole. Reed drove her to the hospital to find out if she did indeed swallow the ring and she did. Two days later she got her ring and the two are set to marry around early June when it is warm and Frostys melt! Although she said she would have felt it. Frostys numb your tongue and she probably didn't feel it. Poor Katilin but at least she will remember it always.

2 The Engagement Ring that Took Off Inside a Helium Balloon

A London man named Lefkos Hajji, wanted to "pop the question" to his fiancee, Leanne, literally. His idea was to hide her $12,100 diamond engagement ring inside a helium balloon. Then, he would present it to her and "pop" the question. Now, some of us see the obvious danger in hiding a ring inside a helium balloon. Lefkos didn't. After leaving the balloon store, a gust of wind swept the balloon out of his hand. Like a bad dream, Lefkos saw her ring (and his money) floating calmly away in a balloon. He tried to chase it in his car for two hours, but it soon became a mere dot vanishing on the distant horizon. "I just watched as it went further and further into the air. I felt like such a plonker," said Lefkos. Leanne, 26, has shown what a worthy bride she will be. She is not speaking to Lefkos until she gets a new ring.

3 The Quirky Marriage Proposal That Triggered an UFO alert

A young man's creative marriage proposal apparently triggered several UFO reports in a small town in Germany. Bavarian police say several people called during one night to alert them to strange lights floating above the sleepy town of Plattling. It turns out the lights were 50 paper lanterns sent aloft by a 29-year-old man proposing marriage to his girlfriend. Neither the man nor the 27-year-old woman were identified. However, police reported the woman did say "Yes."

4 The Man Who Dropped The Ring On Brooklyn Bridge

Imagine saving enough money to buy the love of your life a beautiful diamond ring, only to drop it off the Brooklyn Bridge just as she agrees to marry you. Teacher Don Walling planned to propose to his girlfriend, Gina Pellicani, on the Brooklyn Bridge's pedestrian walkway with his family looking. But at the moment of truth, Walling dropped the ring through a crack in the pedestrian bridge and into traffic on the Brooklyn Bridge roadway below. But he didn't let his shock sway him for long. He kissed the bride to be and said he was going to get the ring back. The groom-to-be jumped onto the bridge's roadway and began looking for the ring.

Miraculously, he found it. The ring is now being repaired and will be restored to its former luster, but Walling said the next time he gives it to his fiance it will be in the safety of his home.

5 The Woman Who Was Swept Out To Sea Before Proposal

A romantic marriage proposal on the Oregon coast turned deadly for the bride-to-be when a wave swept her out to sea. Scott Napper had taken 22-year-old Leafil Alforque to Proposal Rock near Neskowin Beach to pop the question at a place that got its name from couples ready to marry. Napper and Alforque had been dating since they met on the Internet in 2005. Napper said the tide had receded around Proposal Rock on Saturday when the couple began to walk to it. He planned to propose and give her the ring he carried in his pocket. About 10 feet from the rock, a wave about 3 feet high suddenly came toward them. By the time he turned to find Alforque, only 4-foot-11 and 93 pounds, she had been caught by the receding waters. She was never seen again.

6 The Man Who Got Rejected in front of 20,000 people

This poor guy planned an elaborate Valentine's Day proposal in front of a live national TV audience and stadium full of people. What in the world could go wrong? Well, you'll have to watch the video.

7 The Woman Who Swallowed her Engagement Ring Hidden in a Cake

Remember that woman who swallowed her ring on a milkshake? Well, she's not alone. A Chinese woman passed out in after accidentally swallowing an engagement ring her boyfriend had hidden in a cake. Mr Chen, of Xinyan Town, Fuqing City, said he was inspired by romantic movies in which leading men hid rings in cakes and gave them to their girlfriends. "I imagined the surprise on her face, mixed with happiness," he regretfully told the Southeast Morning Post.

Instead, his girlfriend Wen fainted when she saw Chen get down on one knee. "I realized I had just swallowed the ring with a full mouth of cake," she said. Chen called the police, who immediately sent Wen to hospital. Doctors used a catheter to retrieve the ring from her stomach.

On waking up, Wen accepted Chen's marriage proposal.

I've always wanted to create my own blog. But being not so good with words, I was hesitant to try it. Until my college friend Che convinced me to finally create one. So I told myself... why not do it? I have a lot of free time on my hands anyway.

So I thought of a title, and of course, what to write on my blog. I am a very private person, and writing about my thoughts and everyday life is definitely out of the question. It took me more than 3 months from the time I decided to create my own blog just to think of the title and the concept for my blog. Good thing I came across this old file while I was cleaning my cabinet. It was a compilation of forwarded e-mail messages which I compiled several years ago, while I was still working in a semiconductor company, where most of our time were spent sending jokes, short stories and inspirational quotes to each other. This is when I decided to make use of this e-mail messages for my blog. I just hope you will enjoy them as much as I had enjoyed them.